The magic of FREE

Have you ever noticed the magic of the word “free”? I don’t know about you but just the mere whisper of it on the wind and my ears perk up and my head swings in the direction i heard it. I think the word free is one of the top ten words recognized and used worldwide regardless of language, race or culture. Trust me use the word, your conversations will seem more interesting, and all of a sudden you’ll be the center of attention. You could be talking about crap but just the mention of “Free” and someone just may come across and ask you what you are talking about.

Is it that people are just downright cheap that they think they are all entitled to “FREE” or everybody just likes a good deal (by deal i mean not pay at all). You may be wondering what “FREE” I’m talking about, according to theFREEdictionary.com free means “Costing nothing; gratuitous: a free meal”. If you look online most people visit sites when the word “free” is mentioned, its like “free” is the pipe that the pied piper used to lure the kids (us) wherever he wants us. You could add the word “free” to ANY situation to let it look more attractive. Four seemingly normal letters strung together to create a powerful tool for controlling the mass…yes i know i sound like a conspiracy theorist but hey we all gotta get our kicks from somewhere.

Here are some situations where the word “free” is used to make it seem more interesting and appealing.

  1. Kill today and get your free all expense paid trip to prison. This one way ticket is courtesy of the legal system, enjoy two square meals and your own 6 ft x 9 ft room. But wait, kill two today and we’ll double your stay…for free! and, if you’re bad enough we’ll let you stay for life!
  2. Free marijuana available here. Get any amount you want, once you smoke it you will die as we have laced it with a deadly poison, but no fear its free!
  3. Kill yourself and we will give you a free funeral…yes you heard right, kill yourself and you will get a free funeral on us! no this isn’t a joke we think a speedy departure from this world by your own hands merits a free funeral, get yours today
  4. Free free free, from the swamps of the Eurasia plains comes blood sucking leeches, already caught just call this number and we’ll give you 5 blood sucking leeches for free, no sign up necessary for this one of a kind deal.
  5. Ever wonder what the Ebola virus feels like? get your free inoculation here today, watch yourself bleed to death as you get this once in a lifetime free inoculation.
  6. Win yourself a free trip to heaven, no more long days of praying and not sinning. No more following the commandments and living a holy life. Steal what you want to steal, covet want you want to covet, just leave a name and email address and we’ll be sending you your free eTicket to heaven today!

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2 comments

  1. Jammy

    Crazy fella u r…..but that was funny stuff…

  2. jamaicangirl2007

    Very funny Shonari!!

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